Writing exercise:
Take a very common thing from your kitchen and write a poem about it.
It will most likely become a poem about something else.
I think I’m going to try a spoon. (There’s actually a pretty famous poem about a spoon – by Billy Collins)
If someone says they read your work, it does not matter whether you believe them or not or whether they did or not – Don’t test them!
I work with an American Pen Award winner – he is the epitome of modest and professional. I ran into him and said, “loved the book.” He said thank you. And that is all we should say!
I had one writer begin asking me questions about their work. I felt they didn’t believe I’d read their work, so they wanted to test me.
Maybe it was they just wanted to ask my opinion or probe my analysis of certain aspects of their work. But, see, I read for pleasure.I’m unprepared to answer questions other than what I enjoyed about the novel.
There are times I’ve read to analyze someone’s work because I wanted to learn something from or when they’ve asked me too because they want my opinion on one or more aspects of their work.
So – when a writer asks some in depth question about some random detail on page 145 – I’m 
really sort of stopped short.
I read nightly. If I read their book or story last week, I’ve probably read another book and 50 student essays since. If I read it last month, we’re talking at least two books, possibly three, and over 124 student essays and 300 short literature responses from students.
Last, but not least, it’s just plain rude. When someone has told me they’ve read my story, I say thank you. If they want to ask me questions or say more, I’m willing to listen. But I leave it to the reader.
Sometimes, that’s what writing feels like.
I recently finished a particularly difficult story. I’d written it over the summer. Then life happened, and while I wrote here and there and started new things, finished other things, submitted, and even came back to this story repeatedly, it refused to be finished.
This story became the terrible twos who kept throwing a spoon down on the floor and crying for me to pick it up only to throw it down again.
When my real children did this – I left the spoon on the floor and shrugged, “guess you’re using your fingers now,” but you can’t do that with a story, huh?
But what you can do with the story – as with all writing – is keep showing up. That’s what I did. I kept putting that story in front of me and trying to work out of the kinks. We can’t give up the story when it gets hard.
One of my favorite stories is one Stephen King tells about Carrie. I’m paraphrasing here: His wife found Carrie in the trash and brought it back to him, saying something to the effect, you can’t stop just because it got hard.
(of course these are the days when we used typewriters or notebooks and were able to physically put those in the trash and not just click delete, which, by the way, don’t ever do! Ignore the story, put it elsewhere, but don’t delete it!)
And I’ve read/heard the above King/Carrie story a few different ways, so it may not be exact; however, the point is – You can’t give up a story because it’s hard.
Even if the story never gets published – I learned something by writing it, by sticking it out.
The new term in student success is “Grit.” (I know, it’s also an old John Wayne movie). It alludes to the idea that the students who struggle and push through who will become a successful student and graduate. It applies across the board – school, life, and definitely writing! (Not surprisingly, to that movie as well).
I recall another story I’d had a particularly challenging time with. And just when I thought it was finished – the dreaded blue screen! It was gone. Memory wiped. I gave it a few weeks (and a long weekend in New Orleans) and came back at it. “Psychic Surprise Party” was published six months later in The Oleander Review. (It will be republished in May online).
Even if this one is never published, I learned something by doing it. I’ve learned something in all of these not-yet-published stories and poems. We are writers. We are driven to write. It is our little corner of the puzzle-solving-world in which we exist.
The next one might be easier. And maybe it’s 
this challenging one that will push something out of the way for the next one. Maybe the next one will be difficult too, but we’re going somewhere, learning something – keep pushing through.
That’s what makes us writers.
And we’re all a little mad here…..
To some people it is.
I have a friend who picks and chooses where he wants to be published so carefully that he submits maybe once or twice a year at most. He hasn’t been published in maybe 6 or 8 years.
He’s an extremely good writer. Better than I. 
He says, he wants to only be published where his name will be seen, where it will matter.
I took this to mean he didn’t approve of my many publications with small presses, some of which no one has ever heard.
What do you value and why? Ask yourself.
Billy Collins, btw, began publishing in what he refers to as fly by night or small presses of which no one ever heard.
How did the three blind mice meet?
Why were they chasing the farmer’s wife?
Go – Write it!
The start of a New Year is a great time to re-evaluate your life, and discover a new direction!
You can start the ball rolling by simply making a choice, “I am now ready for my life to change!”
This in itself is a powerful acceptance. On making this choice you are nudging the door open, ever so slightly, to new opportunities.
The next step is to create clarity by reassessing your life. Take the time to think about how you would like your life to be? What is working for you and what is not! Also include how you are feeling emotionally, for example are you happy, sad, feel loved or unloved, motivated? What changes would you like to make?
Formalise your conclusions by making lists, which you can refer back to, and expand on. If you are unsure of how to change your life and the steps to take, this is ok, as it will come. If the mind has clarity and guidelines from you, then anything is possible. You are basically opening your life, to new opportunities.
Take the time to put energy into your new choices, to move them into creation. From time to time go back and look at your lists – also importantly set yourself tasks with a time frame.
On accepting a new choice, opposition on the subconscious level may arise, and unknowingly you may create an obstacle in your path. At these times it is important to seek to understand what is actually happening, and let go of the negatives, and continue to affirm your positive, new choices. Keep going, be determined, hold to your dream and you will get there!
STRENGTHENING POSITIVE CHOICES -AFFIRMATION
Life is a matter of choice. I choose to prosper, to be aware, to be strong, to be adventurous and safe. I choose to be happy, to be confident!
Visit Me Here for more Inspiration
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Thanks, Linda!
Something I often hear as a counselor is clients speaking about the weight of expectations they feel they’re carrying on their shoulders; and the frustration, guilt, or resentment they feel in relation to them.
Many of these expectations are often tied to a particular role they “fall into,” that contains within it: unexamined assumptions relating to some action(s) they feel they should be doing, rules for communicating (what they feel they should be saying, and how), pressures to take on board “shared” viewpoints…
Often they express feeling as if they lost their center or connection with themselves.
Some roles are consciously/purposefully chosen. I choose to relate to clients within the boundaries of a counselors’ role. At other times, individuals can fall into an interaction where there is an expectation/pressure to engage in a “role-play”… mindlessly… pulled by some emotional pathway, deeply engraved by a lifetime’s worth of conditioning… For example, many adults continue to feel strongly affected by their parents’ perceived expectations of them…
Sometimes individuals’ roles within relationships include assumptions about hierarchy (in some cultures more than others), expectations relating to distributions of privileges, expectations relating to the division of weight that is placed on the inner experience of each individual. Often, the language which does not fit an expected role-script is unwelcome, discouraged…
One of my favorite historical examples of a figure who modeled the importance of rising beyond roles and cultural expectations, and embodied authenticity and inner strength, was Jesus. I admire the way he kept right away from describing himself via popular roles or politically loaded terms of the time, which he perceived as a poor fit with his life’s journey and purpose.
I love the way Jesus preferred to describe his inner experience and communion with God using creative metaphors-that beautifully made use of people’s familiar associations (e.g. used imagery such as harvests, laborers, etc.) yet transcended the language of the well established familiar social and political roles, traditions, expectations, and their underlying beliefs and perceptions.
Jesus had a hard time with the Pharisees. Perhaps they perceived his non-compliance with the established roles that reinforced their power and privileges-most unsettling. Jesus smacked too much of personal power, disregard for the authority of political/social pecking order…
Possibly to connect with a sense of inner peace, he was documented to withdraw into solitude oftentimes, perhaps in this way he restored his strength by nurturing his connection with God. Just as in his case, I believe that it is a helpful first step in our journey towards authenticity to find ways to connect with a loving place of self-care and strength within ourselves.
Given the powerful focus our society (and at times other people) have on trying to hijack 
our attention and encourage us to look to the outside of ourselves for fulfillment–creative expression of, and reflection on, our inner experience allows us to re-center and reconnect with our inner journey of transformation.
And, support us in reclaiming control over reconstructing our experience so that it resonates with our values, faith, the direction of our journey, and more closely aligns with our truth.
Bozena Zawisz
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Many Thanks for sharing!
A writing exercise to get your rusty writing pipes lubricated.
Write the same scene from three different points of view. I know this doesn’t sound new and groundbreaking, but when is the last time you did it? And what types of characters did you choose?
Let’s lighten it up for you – stretch your skills. If you’ve never written from the opposite gender point of view – try it. This is an exercise I did with Dad Shining. This story could not have been narrated by a woman, it had to be chronicled by a man. And that man, it turns out, had to be the son. Dad Shining was published by Chicago Tribune’s Printers Row Journal – so I must have done something right.
But don’t stop there – go further. Write it from a pet’s point of view. The Art of Racing in the Rain is an adult novel narrated in total by the dog. And it is a GREAT novel! Imagine a story from outside of the human point of view.
Or write it from a child’s point of view. Because my children are older, and I’m presently writing a story which involves a nine year old girl, I’ve had to call my friends. I was fortunate enough to spend time with a delightful little girl and found the time and the young woman inspiring. I have even more ideas than I can handle.
Let me know how it goes – share in our Writing 365 Group.
Noreen Lace 
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