The Evolution of Writing Style

A prompt in a writing group to think about style inspired me to consider the evolution of my own writing style.

Writing evolves, grows, hopefully gets better, with all we learn and experience in life.  But style is something a little different. Style, sometimes, doesn’t change. Or, I should argue, doesn’t change that much. Maybe, it’s the small changes that only a critical reader might notice.

Last year, when I published Here in the Silence, I felt the stories earned that title. All the protagonists were struggling with finding their own voice. They felt silent or silenced, either from their own lack or from those around them.

This year, with Namas-Cray, my characters are different. Some are still struggling with being heard, (Of Strays and Exes), while some believe they are completely aware of who they are and what they want (A Perfect Day). There’s darkness, but there’s a dark ironic humor that embeds itself in their thoughts and actions: “Of Strays” begins with “When I killed my neighbors dog….” and in “A Perfect Day” a woman’s suicide is interrupted by an armed burglary.

What’s different between these two years of writing is the ironic humor. And, I’ve noticed that’s worked it’s way into most of my writing, including my poetry, “The Fly” features a fly who has “24 rose colored hours” of life, both celebrating and loathing those hours.

I’ve always handled my own life’s struggles with humor. When my daughter was a teenager, she looked at me and said, “Is everything funny to you?” Anyone who has a teenager knows – it’s got to be funny or you’ll lose your freaking mind. Therefore, to answer her question, I gave her a long, slow nod (gritting my teeth).

Does that mean my writing style will make you laugh at the dead dog or at the woman’s suicide attempt?  Absolutely not!  That’s where the irony comes in. It’s subtle and sardonic. The protagonist in “Of Strays,” offers to pay for the dog.  She doesn’t quite get the loss. But the protagonist grows to understand. And, in “A Perfect Day,” suicide is never a humorous topic, but our very serious plans being interrupted by life is something everyone can relate to. Her day is no longer so perfect when an armed robber says, “your money or your life.” And his plan, certainly, is not going as well either. Irony!

One of my students believes that “humor” should never be used in conjunction with a serious topic. In many cases, this is true. But we have to look at the irony surrounding the fiction that is how we learn and grow; introducing a topic with subtly allows the readers a way in to understand the situation, relate, empathize. The same is true of our lives. If you slam someone with truth, they are likely to back off and not engage. We introduce ourselves first, our struggles, along with the irony of moving on in our lives.

Let’s take a look at my life – what has happened in my life that might have made me feel more sardonic.  I teach a report writing class, which I run like a lesson in professionalism. How you present yourself as well as your writing says a lot about the person you are.  And then comes this Presidential campaign. How do I tell my 18-22 year old students to act like a professional when #45 acts like a spoiled child who’s had too much sugar?

Irony much?  This year, I was offered an African American Literature course. How do I stand in front of 36 students of diverse backgrounds as a white woman lecturing them on African American Lit?  Humor. Confront the irony. I asked them on the first day of class, “Does anyone want to know why a white girl is teaching an African American Lit Course?”

(According to the students, btw, I did a great job. Let me say, that I absolutely loved it! We built some iron bridges of communication in that class that I hope the students take out into the world with them. I took the course for a number of reasons, one of them was the above #45. But that’s a whole other story – We’re focusing on irony, life, writing style).

I do believe life affects writing style. Everything we learn, do, experience, and want should affect our writing style. We should grow and evolve as humans and as writers.

I was stuck once on a story. I’d been working with it, not quite able to get it to that sweet spot, when I decided on a vacay to New Orleans. I’m not much of a drinker, so it’s not the absinthe smoothies on Bourbon Street that inspired the trip, so much as the fanfare, the history, and the culture. I might have thought about the story while I was there; I don’t really remember. But, upon my return, the answer materialized. The story became what it needed to be. (It’s under consideration for an award as I write this).

That trip has stayed with me, as well as my other travels, other experiences: the homeless man at Starbucks focusing with intensity on a spiral bound notebook as if he was finishing his own novel – “$1.00 Stories” – the psychic who told me my illusion bubbles had burst “How to Throw a Psychic a Surprise Party” and so on. We must let life affect us, work its way into us, our style must evolve, or we stay stuck in life and in art.

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I’m interested in hearing thoughts on this.  Do agree? Disagree? Has your style changed? How or why?

Random facts stalkers don’t know…

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I grew up in a tough neighborhood. (don’t stereotype me)

I was in a band. (for about 5 minutes)

I was in a few movies. (another 5 minutes)

I wrote my first “novel”at the age of 11. (an angst ridden piece about a girl who is kidnapped because she witnessed a crime)

I was actually kidnapped. (not at 11/that story is waiting for publication)

I always have wanted to own a Munster-like house.

I’ve gotten lost in every major city I’ve ever been (including abroad. Trust me when I say every country/every city has neighborhoods you don’t want to be lost in at dusk)

I keep a lot of random facts as well as insignificant details in my brain. (jokes don’t stick tho)

now the stalkers know – don’t be a stalker….

Writing Wishes and Publication Dreams

I’ve been working on a new story – not only working – OBSESSED!  I don’t think I left the house for most of January and part of February until the first draft was done. I’m currently working through it again and again.  I’ve begun to gather my beta readers, and I’m quite excited.

Weekly, I spend time submitting. This is what a working writer does. Writes and submits. Rejections are no fun, and I get plenty of them. I read one statistic that read, “a writer gets an average of 26 rejections for every acceptance.” Not sure how they came up with that… I feel like it’s three times that much; however, things change!

Malcolm Gladwell, estimates it takes 10,000 hours to master any one thing. I feel like I should have reached those hours long ago; but, maybe, it takes some of us a little longer to get it. (That’s the story of my life!)

So – I have to update you.

My poem, “All At Once”, was a finalist in Medusa’s Laugh NanoText Contest. I didn’t win, but it’s still to be published in their anthology and in an e-book version. This should be available soon!

My poem, “I’ve Never Looked So Beautiful” has just been accepted by Mother’s Always Write. Before you start thinking I’m quite full of myself – the poem is about my lovely daughter! This should be available in the next month.

My story, “How to Throw a Psychic a Surprise Party” has been accepted by The Oleander Review. Sometimes, I write something and I think, this is pretty damn good, and I think this story says a lot about our humanity. I’m so happy that it will be published. It will be available mid-April

Finally, ladies and gentlemen, Writer Advice has just notified me that my story, “Memorial Day Death Watch”, has been chosen as a finalist in their Flash Memoir Contest!

We must have a purpose – I’ve always wanted to reach people, tell them they’re not alone. I think I’m just beginning to do that.

Live an Inspired Life!

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The Corner of Bitter and Christmas

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I went shopping last week. It was earlier in the day, around 11am, on a weekday when stores aren’t usually busy.

I sat on a rather large bench to try on the shoes. It could have easily sat four people, but the sales person set the shoes on the bench next to me leaving room for at least two other people. I tried on a pair. A woman came up, she was lingering around, looking at shoes. I wasn’t paying much attention to anything other than the comfort of the shoes I was trying on. The woman set down the box of shoes in one empty space, set down her large purse in her other empty seat, and continued to stand.

When I got up to walk over to the mirror and examine my shoes, she pushed my shoe boxes further over, said something to her husband that I did not hear, and took my seat.  I didn’t say anything, assuming she’d be gone by the time I returned anyway.

She tried on the new shoes, changed back into her shoes, and stood up just as I imagined. I went over, sat back down, and tried on the other pair of shoes. I got up again, expecting she’d take my seat again, but she did not. She grabbed her things, looked my way, and said something like “what’s wrong with some people?”

At the register, the cashier was ringing out the first person in line. There were two other people in front of me. The cashier had forgotten to take the customer’s return from the final price. The customer was very impatient. The woman behind her turned to her friend and said something, loud enough for everyone to hear, about the customer. Sensing an argument that I didn’t want to be a part of, I checked my phone. The customer having the problem walked away without a purchase, causing more negative comments from the friends behind her about how she’d wasted their time. They turned to me, an attempt to bring me into their circle. I looked at my phone, avoided their gaze.

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After that purchase, I needed to pick up an order from another counter. Another long line, so I waited. Again, more impatient people. The woman in front of me walked up to another sales person, “can’t you get someone else to help?” She returned, looked at me, and tried to bring me into her circle of complaining about the service.

The first thing that occurs to me is: 1. We have become a very impatient society. I remember waiting in long lines with my mother as a child. People waited patiently, because the wait was expected. Today, with our instant society, no one is expected to wait, and no one expects to have to wait.  Does anyone remember the long lines in a Blockbuster video store on a Friday evening?  and 2. The Christmas Season is upon us. The season where, unlike the ideal – let their be peace on earth, people are more stressed than at any other time of the year.

Let’s be honest. Christmas time is not the most wonderful time of the year. ESPECIALLY when you’re shopping.

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Even every day activities, like running to the market for the usual items, becomes more of a chore. The lines are longer, which honestly is NOT the problem. The problem is how the people act in those lines.

At a local  market, I got into the wrong line. I did not see the 15 Items or Less Sign. The person in front of me had a full cart. The man behind me had a full cart. I had probably 20 items. At least two other people in that line waited patiently behind that man without saying a word. But a man walked up to the very back of the line and instantly started complaining. I didn’t pay attention. To hear people complaining about lines is like white noise in the supermarket. But his voice kept getting louder, closer, then he was behind me. He was yelling – YELLING – at the man behind me about having too many items. The man moved his cart and let him go in front of him. The cashier was just about to ring through my things when the man moved his attention to me – “I guess you can’t read either.”  I turned around to see, yes, he was indeed speaking to me. He had two children with him. I had no idea what he was talking about until he pointed out the small sign over the register. He had successfully bullied himself to the front of the line and I was the only one standing in his way to be first. The cashier paused, wondering if I was going to let him in front of me. And, you know what, had he called it to my attention nicely, had he asked me with any decency, had he not just bullied the other people in line and berated the old man behind me, I would have let him go – But, it’d been a long day, I was tired, and this man was an asshole. I told him to take a flying leap – well, we’ll say those are the words I used. And the cashier rang me through. The man was still not satisfied with being next; he continued yelling until the manager came over and took him to another register to wait on him personally.

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These things happen every day around the holidays. People are pressured, stressed, trying to make their holiday the best for their family, try to get things done between work and other responsibilities, and people lose their patience, if not their minds, in the effort to do so.

Welcome to the corner of bitter and Christmas.

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We are supposed to be nicer this time of year, more patient, more beautiful to one another, but so many people lose sight of that.

When I must go out and face the crowds, I prepare myself by telling myself that I must be more patient than those who are not, kinder than those who are not, and I must smile especially for those who are not.

At one sale, my daughter handed me a prized purse; the last of its kind. I wasn’t certain I wanted it but, if I put it down, it’d be gone. I was looking at the purse, wondering if I should really buy it just because it was the last of its kind and everyone else wanted it, when I noticed the woman across the display from me.  I smiled.  She smiled.  “I’m sorry,” she said. “If you’re going to put it back, I’d like to have it.” I handed it to her. She was extremely grateful and happy. I’d made her day. Now, that’s the Christmas Spirit.

I don’t go out on Black Friday. There is nothing I want or need that is worth fighting – literally – fighting for. The stores set things up like a competition – think about it: Competitive Shopping! I say, don’t give in!

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In light of everything that is going on in our society right now, in the world, I say keep your common sense, keep your dignity, keep your smile, and stay patient in the face of those who are not. Do not meet them at the corner of bitterness and Christmas, come on over to the Self Respect Cafe and relax.

Less stress means fewer wrinkles, better sleep, an overall better feeling throughout the holiday season – and you’ll never have see one of those embarrassing pictures of yourself.

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This season – be kind, be happy.

The Psychology of being “Unloved”

 

When I create a character, I take what I know from personal experience, what I’ve observed in other people (I am an avid people watcher), and what I’ve learned from my continued studies.

With the unnamed narrator/character in West End , it is important to understand the primary relationships and their effects.

In West End, the children are nearly parentless. Mom is an alcoholic who dies from the disease and Dad seems to be a workaholic, seemingly unconcerned about his children.

The article, “Unloved Daughters,” written by Peg Streep, lists some of the attributes the character in West End experiences.

Streep’s list is of 7 attributes. These are a few which I believe my character displays:

  1. Lack of Confidence

“The unloved daughter doesn’t know that she is lovable or worthy of attention; she may have grown up feeling ignored or unheard or criticized at every turn” (Streep).

    3.   Difficulty setting boundaries

“Many daughters, caught between their need for their mother’s attention and its absence, report that they become “pleasers” in adult relationships. Or they are unable to set other boundaries which make for healthy and emotionally sustaining relationships” (Streep).

   5. Making avoidance the default position

“Lacking confidence or feeling fearful sometimes puts the unloved daughter in a defensive crouch so that she’s avoiding being hurt by a bad connection rather than being motivated to possibly find a stable and loving one” (Streep).

 

It seems the reason the narrator in West End avoids life is an overall lack of confidence. She does not set boundaries; she knows what is happening at the trains and with her sister is not leading anywhere productive or good, but she is unable to set the boundaries for herself, let alone for a sister. And avoidance is her default position in everything.

However, it is my wish the reader can see the hope within the novel, the things that change within the character that can create something positive.

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Set Intentions

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I’m not one who believes in Resolutions.  Seems like a plan for procrastination and failure. When I want to do something – I just do it. I don’t wait until January One. But – being as we are celebrating a New Year – I do believe in setting Intentions.

Intentions are what we want to accomplish. We tell ourselves that this certain something is what we want to happen. Intentions also begin when we say them. Maybe they don’t manifest at that moment, but the intention is set, and if we come back to it and try, not only will it manifest, it will become an actuality, a realization, when we want it to. An intention is not a diet or workout regimen; an intention, or so it seems to me, is a decision to change your life. We don’t set an intention to lose ten pounds. We set an intention to eat healthier and live better. It’s a way of thinking about what we desire and bringing it into our lives.

 

May this New Year bring you health, happiness, love, and success.

May you live your life with passion and spread compassion wherever you go.

May all your intentions be actualized.

Beautiful…

Many years ago, I paid a random compliment to a sales clerk. I think it was her earrings that caught my attention. I watched her whole face transform. She thanked me and helped me (and the next customers) with enthusiasm. I realized that the smallest compliment had the power to change someone’s mood, perhaps someone’s day.  From then on, I’ve made an effort to be kind and pay compliments.

My story, “All the Beautiful People” was inspired by my people watching. People are always so concerned, worried, picking at themselves. It occurred to me that rarely do people see their own beauty – and that everyone is beautiful.  I’m not talking about physical beauty – I’m talking about that which goes beyond the physical.

A student experimented with her video camera and her compliments. The results are pretty amazing.

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Student Video Captures People’s Faces when They Were Told They Were Beautiful

Student Video Captures People’s Faces when They Were Told They Were Beautiful

 

Sometimes, people don’t hear these very important words.

Language, compliments, can change someone’s mood, change their day. Maybe, it has the power to change a life.

Be positive. Be kind. Be generous with compliments.

I Used to Use My Brain; Now I Use Google.

The other day, I googled a location in downtown Los Angeles, made mental note of the ease of its relationship to the freeway, and hopped in my car, confident in my Google Maps app.

(I must admit, it is a place I don’t visit unless required to by an errand, appointment, or event. I went to the Staples Center for a concert. I’ve met friends for events, even did a 5K. I like downtown. Yet, with traffic and one way streets, my lack of knowledge of the area, and my fear of the crime that still infiltrates the lovely old and new buildings of downtown, I don’t find myself exploring too often, and especially not by myself at night. And yes, I know, to some extent this is silly. My friend metro’s down there all the time, by herself, at night!)

In any case, my Google Map app suggested a plan different than I was familiar with. But I took it to avoid the traffic that GM claimed was blocking my rather straighter path. I felt confident in my Google app abilities. It once saved me thirty minutes from a blocked freeway due to an accident in San Juan Capistrano by announcing forcibly and loudly, “exit here.” And I did. I took to unfamiliar streets and roadways, and found myself at the right place even ahead of schedule. This had endeared me, allowed me to trust the app that I’d never relied on alone before.

Previously, when GM suggested I take the 605 instead of whatever I was on, I clicked the dismiss button because I know nothing about the 605; and even if the 5 or the 405 or whatever was cramped or sauntering, limping along, I knew those freeways. I could get off, get on, get to the other, find a gas station, a starbucks.

But emboldened by my Google Maps’ saving grace at the unfamiliar beach town, I allowed GM to tell me to take the 210, transfer to whatever, and then turn here or there.

But then – my phone shut down.

I was in the middle of nowhere – well, I was somewhere, obviously, but I didn’t know where. I didn’t know what turn was next, and then what after that? And what if it got dark as I was attempting to find my way? And why did my phone turn off? Do I want to be lost downtown without my phone at night?

Uhm, no.

Wait, wait. I am of another generation. I am of the generation that grew up without Google Maps or even electronic, satellite connected, mapping devices. I’ve been stuck in other downtowns, at night, I’ve gotten lost in every major city of every country I’ve ever been to. I always found my way home. Or found my way somewhere.

Today, tired, not feeling well, not motivated to spend the hour in traffic to go downtown anyway, I pulled off the freeway and sat in an empty lot staring at my dead phone. What did I do?

In the past I’ve made mental notes, or even physical notes, of the freeways, the exits, etc. Previously, I might have printed out the directions, just in case. Today, however, I’d done no such thing. I’d barely looked at the route. I let Google take over.

I sat there deciding. Did I continue on, hoping signs would tell me what to do, where to go? Did I ask directions? In the old days, the gas stations had maps on their walls, map books behind the counter. Now they had advertisements on the walls, vapes behind the counters.

The attendant looked at me strangely. “I’m not from this area.”

The other employee said something to the effect, “take the 210 to the 5, and then….”

A customer pulled out his phone, “Where?” he asked. “Take the 210, to the 2, get off at ….”

And it was all lost to me. I didn’t trust these strangers. I’d trusted Google. I’d trusted Samsung.

How much we trust our electronics instruments these days. How lost we are, literally, and metaphorically, without them.

Google finishes our sentences for us. Google saves our searches. Google offers us suggestions in random order controlled by those who clicked before us. Google helps us with our every day lives and allows us the luxury of not having to think, to plan, to do much of anything. Press a button, watch a movie, press a button listen to the summary of a book, press a button……

But – not really – Google doesn’t do these things.

We allow Google to do these things for us. To us. And we became just a little bit more comfortable in our dependence.

Had I taken a moment to even look at the route. Had I made the decision to take the route I was familiar with. Had I done a little more planning and work, everything would have gone a little more smoothly.

Google, I do appreciate you. But I really need to count on myself a little bit more.

Of Strays and Exes… And better yet – Friends. Congrats to Jo Rousseau!

I’ve been asked to read my as-of-yet unpublished fictional story “Of Strays and Exes” at Jo Rousseau‘s publication party.

Jo Rousseau is celebrating the publication of her first book of short stories, titled Inside Stories.

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She’s published short stories and won Charter House Press’ essay contest last year with her touching memoir “Becoming Rousseau”, which is available in Banking the Bacon.

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Check out her website!

Congrats to a lovely woman and a good friend; She deserves all the success life (and publication) have to offer.   Much Love!

Let’s talk about Legacy

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Today is the 166st anniversary of Poe’s Death

      One of the most valuable things on this planet, to me, is leaving your mark, affecting others, effecting change – making a difference, somehow, someway, to someone.

   Edgar Allan Poe affected all of our lives by those he inspired. He inspired artists, musicians, authors, and others.

   Poe wrote one of the first published detective stories, The Murders in the Rue Morgue.  Inspired by the character Dupin, Arthur Conan Doyle created Sherlock Holmes.  Sherlock Holmes studied, differentiated, analyzed evidence to solve crimes.  Prior to Holmes, the study of evidence at crime scenes was elementary, limited. The science of forensics was inspired by Sherlock Holmes stories.

    Forensics, as we know it today, was developed over a long time, inspired by writers who were inspired by others, inspired by Edgar Allan Poe and his ability to focus in on details that others glossed over.  Poe left a very big mark on our society.